of Sabrina Ciancone
I wonder if, to nurture trust, we must have a stable, unchanging, recognizable reference, or if trust can also be placed in something or someone that changes appearance, attitude, feelings, programs. If trust is permeable, elastic, evolving, adapting itself to continue in novelty.
(The famous liquid trust by Bauman!)
I wonder about trust and transformations because if the former is harmony, complicity, love, openness, surrender, how can one defend and protect oneself from changes that instead negate, overturn? I reflect on the bond I have with Fontecchio; so strong, ancient, deep, multifaceted. A love that demands and gives trust, which is perpetual but transforms every day. I wonder if those who innovate, alter, subvert, add traditions need trust and inspire it. If every change is betrayal or simply a symptom of life.
On April 17, 1980, I wrote an essay: 'How I would like to see my town transformed.' 'Fontecchio is a town of 481 inhabitants, located on a hill, surrounded by medium mountains, it has many historical monuments: the tower, the fountain, St. Francis, etc., it has 6 shops, the barracks, the town hall, the nursery, elementary schools, middle schools, a nursing home, a professional training course, the college, the cinema; one could say that Fontecchio is a beautiful town. Beautiful yes, but not so much for me. I would like a different, new Fontecchio. Here's how I would like it (really): I would like a gym, a park, public gardens, a pool, more shops, a dentist, factories, a hospital. Here's how I would like Fontecchio (unrealistically): an amusement park, a disco for kids under 15, a power plant, a gas depot, a supermarket; more friends, morally I would like to change people's souls, that they be kinder and more generous. I would make it the greenest town and perhaps I would even change its name, I would call it: FANTASIO; can you imagine Fantasio April 17, 2520. You know how science progresses? In short, I would like to completely change Fontecchio. If only it were possible! Maybe my imagination went out of orbit. While making plans for Fontecchio, I came up with the idea of also placing a surveyor robot in my town. Who knows if all its projects will be accurate, if they were Fantasio would truly be the most advanced town."
(Archaeological emotional exercise like Jung!)
After forty intense years, I see how many transformations have changed habits, appearances, perspectives. They were driven by: nature, the inhabitants, the representatives, every passing person, those who knew it from afar, the abandonments. I felt protected, reassured by a context, a view, a house that I no longer recognize. So, what does one refer to, hold on to if the transformations are continuous and radical? I am convinced that even the requirements of trust change: in a relationship, friendship, work, neighborhood.
(Maybe Crepet said it first!)
And so trust requires transformations! I am convinced that trust fails, understanding disappears if one remains immobile, if its form does not change. Reciprocity: if you smile at the faces you meet, the chances that someone will smile back increase; I give renewed trust every day to reciprocate what others place in me. Change is not renunciation, inconsistency; those who are capable of questioning themselves, reshuffling the cards, doubting themselves deserve consideration. And much trust. Transformations deserve trust.
(Freely adapted from Rob Brezsny's horoscope!)
The intelligence of the young, the audacity of the utopians, the resilience of the honest: powers capable of subverting, creating, or even restoring, deserving of trust. So: trust in the young, in the utopians, in the honest.
(They sound like words from Gaber!)
Courage: courage is needed to transform, to trust, to desire. Without regrets, rewinds, hypotheses of what could/should have been done or said. We are in the flow, we remember but we can choose what to make "present," current, and fertile from what is "past" happy or painful, shameful or edifying. Every form evolves. Our relationships and our country, change the faces we smile at on the street, the food on our plates, the music in our ears, the scents on our bodies.
(Maybe it's a song by The Doors?!)
So: trust, transformations, courage, and peace. Peace not as the abstract antipode of conflict. Peace as pride in doing, of doing a small, constant part to deserve an ever-changing trust, to operate slow and widespread transformations, to have patient courage to begin. Every step a beginning, every day a beginning, every kiss or word. And to start the silences, appropriate, humble, full of the growth of what was sown, of the fruits of waiting, of the metamorphoses of bodies, feelings, desires.
Fraîche comme la neige des sommets
douce comme le miel du printemps
légère comme le vol des lucioles
sinueuse comme l’épi du blé
la voix de ma femme caresse mon corps
et console mon âme faible de tristesse.
Fraîche comme le vent de la mer
douce comme les fruits des palmiers
légère comme les bras d’un enfant
sinueuse comme la flamme d’une bougie
la peau de mon homme accueille mes caresses
et garde à toujours mes larmes de distance.
(Perhaps listening to Brassens and Gims influences!)
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